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Wank

Term: Wank
Definition: To masturbate.
Date Added: 13 March, 2007
ID: 420

Definitions From Urban Dictionary:

• predominantely British term for masturbation
  Example: Buffing the Banana Holding Your Sausage Hostage Jackin' the Beanstalk Rounding up the Tadpoles Slap Boxing the One-Eyed Champ Spank the Frank Applying the hand brake Attacking the one-eyed purple-headed warrior Auditioning the finger puppets Beef-stroke-it-off Boxing the bald champ Charming the snake Checking for testicular cancer Choking Kojak Squeezing the cream from the flesh Twinkie Straddle your paddle Taking matters into your own hands Teasing the weasel Thumping the pump Tickling the pickle etc etc
• a derogatory british word describing the gentle art of masturbation often misused by americans. Hence: 1)wanking- not wanking off 2)wanker- not wank 3)a situation can be a wank
  Example: 1) i was wanking (when my mother walked in). i had a wank. 2) Graham is a wanker. Americans are wankers. 3) That was a wank(the film, lecture, class, job interview etc).
• An act involving the following equipment: A. Palm with five fingers B. An errect penis If the correct equipment is present, then and only then shall this act be carried out. One must then wrap the five fingers around the fallus and then a motion similar to playing a violin played with a horsehair bow should be achieved, although alot more vigiorously, until a white substance appears from the bell shaped head of the penis and flows like blood from a exposed artery would.
  Example: Simon Sepahzad
• A colloquial reference to male masturbation.
  Example: Although E. M. Forster enjoyed Virginia Woolf's company, he'd often wish she'd shut up and leave so he could enjoy a rollicking good wank in the gazeebo.
• 1. British slang for masturbation or masturbating. 2. An on-line discuss without purpose or substance that often involves pretension and bullshit.
  Example: 1. There was a guy in the park having a wank in the bushes. 2. Then the entire conversation degenerated into complete wank.
• .bash the bishop .choke the chicken .yank the plank .clean the pipes .grapple the gorilla .pet the one eyed snake .stroke the salami .massage colin .toss off .shake hands with the milkman .plain old wank .greet the old chap .tommy tank
• British term to describe masturbating, sometimes known as: josseling flogging the dolphin playing tug of war pumping your fist having a "german tank" having a "down town jeremy brown" having a "five knuckle shuffle" having "one on the house" American terms include: beating off whacking off jerking off
  Example: he is upstaires having a jossel, would you like to leave a message?
• Wield the flesh baton to great orchestral effect.
  Example: Goodness me. Now I understand why Handel called it Water Music.
• 1) To run one's hand up and down the shaft of the penis repeatedly until semen shoots forth 2) To relieve sexual tension alone (males)
  Example: I was caught wanking in the school locker room. He wanked to a picture of a naked woman. It's hard to wank when I can't wrap my hand totally around my shaft.
• 1. To masturbate - wank. 2. [Bullshit]
  Example: 1. Im off to have a wank. 2. What a wank.
• (v.) To masturbate. (adj.) A blow-off, something boring.
  Example: Bart: C'mon man, everyone knows the first day of school is a total wank! Principal Skinner: If by 'wank' you mean 'educational experience' then by golly it is wanking time!
• 1.British for msturbation. 2.An insult to do with wanking (see above). 3.something shit.
  Example: 1. God, I need a wank. 2.Yanks are such wankers 3.That film was wank.
• stroking the genitals for sexual stimulation so you can bone some hot fuck up the ass!
  Example: i need to have a wank otherwise our date will be a right cock up.
• 1) (verb) To brag excessively, usually over computer components 2) (verb) To have a meaningless discussion over abstract theories; a pissing contest 3) To masturbate
  Example: 1) Fucking NICK won't stop wanking about his 386 laptop and how it was the new hotness 84 years ago. 2) The moronic intellectual was wanking off about his latest 'theorem' 3) Everytime I have a wank I wipe out a small civilization
• The act of self masturbation (verb)
  Example: Hey John, wanna go catch a beer? No, I think I'm just going to go home and have a wank.
• British source... To masturbate. Worthless.
  Example: Where's Frank? Dunno, having a wank I suppose. That heap of crap aint worth a wank.
• To rub your penis until you get much pleasure and you shoot sweet cum.
  Example: I had a good onld wank last night, The sheets were soaked in cum!
• Verb - The act of readjusting ones underwear vigorously during a film on channel 5 (uk).
  Example: Channel 5(uk) - what a load of wank!!!!
• to play with ones self in a sexual way!
  Example: shaking hands with the one eyed snake. slapping the salami choking the chicken jacking off
• 1. Masturbation. 2. n. Rubbish. e.g. "Don't talk wank". 3. v. To masturbate. As in "My brother wanks all the time and he's got perfect eyesight".
  Example: As in "If you have a wank every day you'll go blind".

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August 29, 2008